Dream a Little PurPINK Fantasy~

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

today's a brand new day. after a good nite's sleep.. and some meditation. not really meditation. but i tried to get rid of all unhappiness over that shit pieca work... anyway. i feel better now... i guess.. if i'm doing something which i like... i shouldn't care bout what other people say. as long as.. i think it's alright then it's okay. but i do hope somedday.. when people tells me how my work sucks, i'll be able to take it lightly and ask,"so, how can i make it better?" - smiling... i dont wish to be boiling or hopping mad.

but. i still have to admit... i still have this degree of negativity inside me. it sure doesn't feel nice when u show someone something u took the time and effort to do.. and he says "ur work sibei erxin leh"... and u ask him again.. he says "ER XIN".. what would u feel? my morale is really shattered. yesterday i had really no confidence to carry on my project. hm.. but.. haiz. what's the point of talking man... i really can't find anything to rejoice about. but i would need to restore some confidence back to get me on track....

anyway, to the good stuff that i did today. went to the beach/park... played frisbee. i'm still the same bad frisbee thrower. whatever i throw will come back to me. funny sight. had quite good fun... but still... i kept thinking about the comments my frens told me....

my gawd. it's so unlike me to talk so negatively... it's just not me to talk like that??!!!! KE YING!! WHAT"S HAPPENING TO U??!!! GET ON UR FEET!!!!
i really want to.. but!!!! gosh.. what's happening to me??!!!!!!

god, please give me back my confidence.

Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
21:29