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Friday, July 29, 2005

at the brink.

finally, i've officially discharged from singapore polytechnic. LoL. that is, I've g.r.a.d.u.a.t.e.d. but really, what IS the biggie at all.... it's just a DiPLoMa. It doesn't mean anything in this society anymore, or is it still?

these two days have been hectic. I am just So exhausted. Play and Work Hard till the limit. and my brain just refuses to take a rest. It's driving me nuts, i feel like a walking zombie. My eyes are so tired and heavy, yet my brain is hyperactive, thinking, having thoughts at furious speeds, it doesn't allow my eyes to rest. and what's happening now??? i've got bloodshot eyes and it's tearing the whole of today. i feel like taking leave. but it's impossible here. sob sob....

some eye candy. as if it really is. oh well....


with all her pride, yours truly =)


da fan shu and we girls


nothing is impossible. anyone can be a lecturer


we never knew he could play SO WELL. he must be at least a grade 6!!


the forgotten redgummer who's found his musings and fanbase elsewhere


look at the grand piano. oh, it's not visible..


my first class photo in 3 years =D how sad.


girls rule!


we meet again, mr song! but this time, we make you proud.


ole! goodbye SP!!


our very own scholar!


friends always. OLE!


han is so pretty!!! and she has got a strand of baroque freshwaters!! NICE~!!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
16:07


Sunday, July 24, 2005

racial discrepancy

why i'm suddenly intriuged to write on such a topic because i simply sympathize the kind of shit my friend is going through. He is not ugly, he just doesn't have any luck in love nor friendships with girls. and he has to resort to online communities. not that he is desperate, but he just likes to be in forums. and in forums, it's terrible to see people shunning whatever channel he is in or leaving him out of conversations even though he is there. some outrageous girl even said "sorry, I'm racist." how sick is that? my view? - VERY -.

i can't believe it's still out there. i mean yes, there is. and it is something that cannot be changed in even 10 years. singapore turns 40 this year. but can we gladly and proudly say that YES! singapore is open to all cultures of the world. but why is it that people have to discriminate indians? i do agree that a lot of indian teenagers spoil the impression others have of their own race. as in we see alot of rowdy indian juveniles. it does not reflect well on their race. still, should we at least be fair to the others? there are indeed bad apples in all races, black, white, yellow or brown. they are there. but why target only one particular group?

i feel for you, my fren(s) =) you know who you are.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
13:09


Saturday, July 23, 2005

we could never have, and we never will.

i went to cookie's house today and i finally saw how i could not accept him as my life-long partner. looks, age and race aside, it's his attitude that totally put me off. alright, i have sseen improvements in the communications "Sector".. but other than that, he's pretty much the same old boring cookie. yes, he cooks me nice stuff and feeds me. yet there are many things i cannot agree with him. i had to demand him to at least send me off till i get onto a taxi. but i told him to go off halfway as i was reaching the main road, which is about the distance to his condo. and he just went away like that after kissing me good night. i mean, hey.... is that the right way to treat a girl? did he really think that we could just kiss and make up just like that? or did he think that i'm THAT simple? I am NoT. he told me the reason he likes me so much is because of my simplicity. but no, i am not so simple. i'm not a simple girl though i might act like one. i was just addicted to you over-cajoling me, over-spoiling me with gifts, food, love, care and kisses. other than that, i do not feel any satisfaction, sadly. though i wish you would have treated me better in other common sense gentlemanly aspects. but why did you have to fail? do not blame me for being cold hearted as to abondon our love of a few months, but we were (are) really not meant to be.

in 2 weeks, he'll be gone to the land i've always dreamed of returning - queensland. for a project. he's requested to be posted there instead of kuala lumpur. while he's there, there will be plenty chances for him to meet an ideal wife. so many asians, so many chinese girls. there, i hope he will forget about me. though i do feel a sense of jealousy, it's all unfounded as i have already made up my mind to reject him. well, i just hope he'll find a good replacement. someone better even. u're really a kind soul and that no one should ever take advantage of. god bless.

and god bless the vulnerable old lady who called up the shop to ask me the day and date. god bless u too!

happy racial harmony day. today, we celebrate intercultural dependence, we celebrate the congregation of all the different races in unique singapore. sadly, chinese still hold there breathe when indians walk past. sadly, people still frown when a group of indians walk past. sadly, chinese call indians "blackies".
why is this still happening? of course i do not mean ALL Chinese, but through my observance and through true encounters by indian counterparts - these are the ugly notions of the society. thomas! come give these people a thought and open their minds to intercultural matters!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
22:56


Friday, July 22, 2005

finally, after being online ALONE while my dear looks on, hoping that he can also have a pc, he finally bought a PC. he's MAD. he bought his PC for 2000 dollars, inclusive of a monitor, keyboard and speakers. He's already got a surround sound system at home and yet.. an altec lansing set. was it altec somethin.. i can't remember. but you know, i'm quite mean. i've always been hoping that he's not able to get a PC.

i know that with a PC, we all can converse and play games online, surf for information bla bla.. but he has way too many games. He's infatuated with FF. i felt that technology will get into the way of any relationship. a very good example would be the television. after work, the whole family comes home and watches someone's favourite drama series. a member of the family is stressed. he tries to tell people about it, but no one listens because they are GLUED to the tv. television stops/prevents all kinds of communications, i suppose. it doesn't help in making your relaitonship better.

The same goes for a PC. there are many online addicts, i know. and with the evolving technology, no one can live without computers anymore. but seriously, it spoils the most native and traditional form of communication, which is "Conversation".

My greatest fear has been confirmed. I called him last night and he was online playing games. Talked to him and he did not answer much. So I made an excuse to put down the phone. I smsed him. And he replied only ONE WORD. that's it. I shall wait to see what happens in the next few days. I'm not gonna let a stupid computer jeapordise our relationship. What is a relationship without communication?
I do not wish him to be another Cookie.

Speaking of Cookie. I have again broken my promise. I've lost him, I guess. He's given up on me. That's what I wish he'd do... I don't want any more rekindling of feelings or hope anymore. He and I should just move on in life.

As I was muching on my breakfast - few sheets of seaweed - just now, I suddenly thought of Thomas. It's been so long since I met him or even talked to him on MSN. I wonder how's he doing. A friend of so many years. I've known him since 13. Online. And he truly is an inspiring friend. He taught me many things in life, gave me direction when I needed. He is sadly, I must say, the only person I can talk openly and freely with. He has that sense of maturity in which I can discuss my dreams with him, and he will guide me to accomplish them. I miss him SO MUCH. I should just send him an e-mail later.

Today's my papa's 63rd birthday.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAPA!!!
Am giving him some ang pow money. LoL...
And he's gonna buy suckling pig and cook chilli crabs. He'll be treating us Martini and loads of Carlsberg. I see a drinking contest between my brother and I tonite. HaHaHa!!

My aunt's going to US to look for her deardear!! Bon Voyage~ All the best, cheers!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
11:01


Thursday, July 21, 2005

why dont i have the gift of the gag???!!!!!

i swear - goodness gracious- i musta sounded like a total freak from outer space. i was tongue tied. i didn't know what to answer, and damn! i couldn't freaking SPEAK sensibly.
i forgot to ask for his phone number.... i'm gonna risk getting hammered by my boss. SHIT!!!!!
please, eric, please call back SOON!!!!! damn it... why did my brain have to stall at that point in time??!!! DAMN! Why can't my brain move faster? SHIT! arghhhhh!!!!!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
11:27


Tuesday, July 19, 2005

chunzhao, let us walk hand in hand into the theatre =)

a few days ago, i came across a headline on sT that said something like .. bye bye spg, hi someone else. i just hate journalists sometimes. why is it they always have to take up this approach of writing in that they have to compare two different individuals? of course, the audiences are often kaypo people. seeing a headline like this, they'll prolly flip to that page to read the article. but actually, i think spg, she is damn hot. of course people around me tell me that she hasn't got a good body and so-forth. what's so hot about her, i feel, is that she is so comfortable with her body. it's her confidence that i admire. and i'm sure it's her confidence that attracts so many men. don't people understand? what's important about being a girl, is to accept and love herself, be confident of herself, her body. that's the most enticing part of a girl. you don't need to have a perfect figure nor a pretty face. if the entire dating game was based on that, why do i see so many couples on the streets? we (they) should probably all be shot dead. i think i saw somewhere in the news that britney would be taking nude pictures of her pregnancy. i think it's a damn cool idea. i wouldn't mind doing that. lol. but seriously, yes, i do not mind.

shocking! raffles holdings is sold for 1.4Billion. is it really worth so little? I don't know, but to have 41 hotels sold for that amount of money seems too little. I can't believe Raffles Holdings is sold!!! Raffles Holdings manages Raffles Hotel, Swisshotel.. bla... can you imagine? It's like the only thing we, as Singaporeans can be proud of. When people think Singapore, they don't think of the Durian. They want to know who the more popular-believed founder is. Raffles! And we could proudly say that Raffles Hotels are owned by SINGAPOREANS. now? TO ANG MOHS. It's not something to make a big fuss about, but they're like selling our own history to be managed by foreigners!!! So many years of toiling, from national to international. and it gets SOLD. this world is crazy.

yesterday, i had a funny dream. i cried. it was a love story. here goes...

i saw myself as a wife of a scientist. my husband is black. he's got tanned skin. it happens in the mountains. think Vertical Limit.

i was putting on clothes for my husband. kissed him goodbye. that day, he'll be sitting in his new creation - to space. he will come back someday. and i will wait. we all gather on the summit of the mountain - our village. he is seated in his vehicle. it will shoot high up into the sky and bring him back someday - we just don 't know when. he goes high up. i cry, we all cry. days past.... one day, i was walking down this steep slope.. and suddenly, i slid down. fell down the cliff. it was like free falling from a high high cliff. perhaps a scene in the himalayans. just that it wasn't cold. as i was halfway through, i looked back and shouted "i love u"... then.. out of nowhere, my husband appeared. in his rock climbing clothes. he had this huge nail dug deep into the cliff, one hand holding on to it. i pulled his hand to stop me from falling. he flew this rope and it caught the other end of the cliff so that it's horizontal. he asked me to hold on to the rope and climb up. but i couldn't. weak. he demonstrated. and i kept giving up. in the end.. i just let go and fell down. my last words are also "i love u". i died.

weird dream..... lol.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
12:06


Saturday, July 16, 2005

love, sister

on my way to the coffeeshop during lunch, i came across these two girls. they must be around my age, from the tone of their voice and language. anyways, they were holding hands. i thought, "how odd". i then recalled that when i was younger, in secondary school, i used to hold hands also. but again, i was quite surprised with myself. i'm not really a touchy person. i find hugging or walking arm in arm with a girl is alright. but holding hands really seems weird in a sense. not that i do not touch girls.. it's just weird when you look at if especially after u've surpassed that time in life. i'd love to experience that feeling once again, though.
i wondered why had it been so easy to just hold my girlfriend's hand just like that. we clutch each other's hands. palm touching palm. our sweats, our thoughts all entwined together. it's kind of magical. we do not have an intimate relationship like we would have with the opposite sex, but it is intimate in its own way. it makes that friendship special, in my opinion.. and it makes me love her more.
like sisters.

i'm going to the treetop walk with guan and siau wei tomorrow morning!!! and i have to crawl outta bed at 6 cos guan's pickin me up at 6:30. hOHo... quite excited actually... maybe can go cycling after that. that'd be fun~

it's girls' night out with the spheres. al dente~!! i can't wait. 2.5 hours more to go. jia you~~~~
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
16:49


Friday, July 15, 2005

i am absolutely bored to bits.. it feels like ITP all over again. Blogging because we just have all the time in the world.

what am i doing now?

I'm tending the shop alone. my mum has gone to benny's to reset the 8star to a size 6.5. and i hope henry means it when he says to give me a pair of drop freshwaters. oohlala~
i ran to the toilet just now - hopefully clive doesn't tell my mum or she'll be freaked out. she freaks out at the simplest of things. i don't understand why. she's scared the shop gets robbed / burglared. in broad day light, yes.

i went to gym just now. and i did the threadmill for the first time this year. i mean ran on the threadmill. i'm losing my determination. i don't know, i just wanna stop losing weight la. it's a bloody difficult chore... !!!!! really... jogging is so boring. it's like.. just running towards -NOTHING- in the gym. i get restless after 20 mins. pui pui.

outing tomorrow with the chics!
choices:
1. Mexican @ Cafe Iguana
2. Italian @ Al Dente, Colors By The Bay (2 votes)
3. Chocolate Buffet @ Fullerton Hotel (2 votes)
4. Raffles Hotel Courtyard

When Cailing's vote comes in, the results will be out. I'm just so excited to meet them all over again.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
15:20




i am a bitch.

and does anyone know why some girls are self-confessed bitches although they aren't really? if a person calls you a bitch, is it a compliment or is it a rude remark? nowadays the language of the world has become so blurry that it'd prolly make a girl beam with pride if she's called a bitch. some even call themselves S.L.U.T.S. i slapped my brother cos we were in a heated argument and he called me a slut. GOD! i mean, man, HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE that SLUT is a complimenting word??!! like we all say, it's a freakin' wacky world!!

and no, i don't think i'm a bitch.

i'm in a minor state of depression now. cookie says he'll be leaving singapore for kL.. singapore gives him too many sad memories. he's probably talking about me though he doesn't admit it. i don't understand why had we got together in the first place. i mean.. it takes a lot of chemistry to go into a relationship. but i have to say... i dont think we had chemistry. i thought he was using me. using me, as in, he wants someone to accompany him. i'd say i want someone to accompany me.. that's why i sought him out. it was all HL's fault! trust him to insult me! and see.. i got myself into hot soup. it's not ethical for me to blame him. it's me. i just wish cookie will stop thinking about the past and look towards the future. he's wasting whatever youth he has, waiting for someone who doesnt return his love. my heart isn't ready to settle down, and i don't think i would want to settle down at such a young age. i often question myself if it's EVEN POSSIBLE for me to settle down. i don't and CAN'T see myself doing that in years to come.
back to the main reason why i'm pretty vexed. i feel like i've ruined his life. singapore's such a nice place.. and yet he has made the decision to leave. if he wants to leave, i'd rather he go back to new york. why kL? he'll probably get better chinese girls over there. matured and kind. someone he can give the unused, unseen diamond ring to..

For months, i have been procrastinating to meet him. a part of me don't want to - simply because i don't want to lead him on, thinking that we'd be possible... and yet, he keeps asking for a meeting... sometimes when i make up my mind to meet him, something always crops up. i start to seriously believe in omens - muktub -. telling me that i really should not meet cookie. i'm suppose to meet him today. and i said "I PROMISE".. cos he was complaining that i never kept my promises. that day was the first time i made a promise to him. and yet... my uncle from hongkong is coming back today - i just got to know this morning. i doubt i'll be able to meet cookie tonight. i can't possibly get away cos they're all meeting in the shop. family's more important. what should i do? i know i can just easily say "Hey, I cant make it today cos my uncle's back in singapore"... but u know how he'll feel? i don't. but i know he'll feel shitty. that i keep throwing whatever faith he has in me to the ground. but i really can't help it. shit.SHIT! i certainly hope i wont spend the whole day/afternoon thinking about my decision...
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
11:16


Thursday, July 14, 2005

peanuts

never mind that the 23 year old cash bank is running away from me, not responding to my phone calls. oh anyway, 23.8k is *peanuts*. we sold two items yesterday!!! weEeEe~~~ such good luck. the dentist came back to get the F/IF *GaSp* 5.6 pts 8st4r for his beloved about-to-be-fiance. he's just so sweet. the boss even gave him a merlot dessert wine! how lucky can a person get ;) all the best, doc!
and i have seen the most loving husband in the world yesterday. this couple came in and his wife couldn't take her eyes off this 17mm pearl ring.. but after that they went out. half an hour later, mr lovingly husband came back to get the ring while the wife is waiting for the tailor to pack the clothes for her son. how sweet!!!

talking about NKF, it's infuriating. LOL. yesterday i mentioned that they probably do not give as much to patients. looks like i'm wrong.. since there are so many cancer and kidney failure patients out there... they DO do a part in helping these people. i guess people shouldn't just stop withdrawing their giro accounts just like that. i believe, since it's something the whole nation is talking about, something will definitely be done. probably the ministers are all coming with a fool-proof plan to sooth the "fire". probably mr goh is scolding his wife for spouting a sentence like,"For a person who runs a multi-million-dollar charitable organisation, $600,000 is peanuts as it has a few hundredmillions in reserves." i don't understand. how is it that an eloquent husband has got a wife who does not talk sensibly. not everyone lives in high income families. it does not reflect well on her husband, does it?

PEANUTS.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
11:42


Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Dig In :)

Get to know yourself better

Your view on yourself:You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
**************
The Real You

You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm. Most guys who get to know you will be attracted to you. You are far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them. Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.

You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life. You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.

You strictly follow rules, and you expect other people to be the same as well. People can get tired of you easily, as you can make them feel a little guilty about themselves. You always make decisions on your own, and can be dismissive of other people's advice. You like to be the leader in groups, but can forget to be concerned about the people you are with.

Your peers think of you as a fun person, but sometimes you can be a little irresponsible. You can be somewhat childish, and can try to ignore the fact that you will one day need to really grow up and be a mature adult! Perhaps you could start reading good books; they might help you look at the world in a different light. You do want to be taken seriously, right?

Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.
*********
you have got to check this out.. contrary to cL's ideal guy, mine's like some barbarian kind... it appears to be that i like "mean guys". though i myself don't think i do... but out of 5 tests that i took, all of them gave similar answers. weird though. if i get a guy like that, i'll update ;)

Who is your dream guy?
He is wild and adventurous. His path is often against the world. He does what he wants when he feels like. His type of girl is quite like him, independent and wise. If you love freedom and willing to risk, go for this guy.
**********

Your Working Style
You have a great deal of warmth, but may not show it until you know a person well. You keep your warm side inside, like a fur-lined coat. You are very faithful to duties and obligations related to ideas or people you care about. You take a very personal approach to life, judging everything by your inner ideals and personal values.

You stick to your ideals with passionate conviction. Although your inner loyalties and ideals govern your lives, you find these hard to talk about. Your deepest feelings are seldom expressed; your inner tenderness is masked by a quiet reserve.

In everyday matters you are tolerant, open-minded, understanding, flexible, and adaptable. But if your inner loyalties are threatened, you will not give an inch. Except for your work's sake, you have little wish to impress or dominate. The people you prize the most are those who take the time to understand your values and the goals you are working toward.

Your main interest lies in seeing the possibilities beyond what is present, obvious, or known. You are twice as good when working at a job that you believe in, since your feeling adds energy to your efforts. You see the needs of the moment and try to meet them. You want your work to contribute to something that matters to you--human understanding, happiness, or health. You want to have a purpose beyond your paycheck, no matter how big the check. You are perfectionists whenever you care deeply about something.

You are curious about new ideas and tend to have insight and long-range vision. You are interested in books and language and are likely to have a gift of expression; with talent you may be excellent writers. You can be ingenious and persuasive on the subject of your enthusiasms, which are quiet but deep-rooted. You are often attracted to counseling, teaching, literature, art, science, or psychology.

The problem for you is that you may feel such a contrast between your inner ideals and your actual accomplishments that you may burden yourself with a sense of inadequacy. This can happen even when, objectively, you are being as effecive as others. It is important for you to find practical ways to express your ideals; otherwise you will keep dreaming of the impossible and accomplish very little. If you find no actions to express your ideal, you can become overly sensitive and vulnerable, with dwindling confidence in life and in yourself.

***
that's it. by this post, i serve to get bullied. catch me if you can. it's but a reference as to how i'm like, since i dont understand myself at all.

Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
16:00




jerk-ass.

my song's specially dedicated to the top-bastard on my list of "unhot & unwanted men".
for the first time in my life, i finally know what the word "bastard" or "jerk" means. i have never seen anyone as bastardized or jerked up as this before.
a girlfriend calls. and all he answers is "(knnbccb! stop calling!!)x3". wTF? i thought he was crazy. banging the pole on the ground and shouting this phrase. then i asked da jie and cheng. oh yes, that's his spare tyre girlfriend. he has two girlfriends. i didn't know girls were this blind. okay, if his character is mean, so be it. can still tolerate. but which stupid chick will allow herself to be so verbally abused?? my god. it's like fucking a girl yet scolding her "whore!" at the same time. he is such a huge dickhead.

i regret not taking pictures of my hair. it's gone now. lol. *shhhh*

recently, a friend of mine just got the boot from his company. i think his boss is ungrateful. imagine being squeezed by your boss. you try to scrimp on expenses, at times even eating into your salary, in your bid to help save money for the company. you're like your boss' second hand mand. on top of your hectic schedule at having to meet deadlines, you have to oversee other meagre tasks like the setting up of networks bla bla. and in the end, you get the boot. HOW GRATEFUL!

and oh, i always think charitable organizations are not honest. that's why i never really give money to these organizations. over the years, NKF have been staging so many shows, i wonder where they get that much money to host a show at such big a scale. 2 running nights. somehow, looking at some of our local artistes slogging over the performance, i decide to just pick up the telephone and CALL. and now, look our vunerable and ignorant we all are. it's not unexpected. i feel that financially crippled kidney patients or patients of terminal diseases will not want to seek help because to ask for assistance in their treatment is so troublesome, no doubt. they have to look through so many records and then decide to give you a small sum. that's probably the case. after the news article, i think singaporeans will now all be more wary of donating to such charity shows. it has left a blackmark on charitable orgs. don't you wonder also, why to ask for donations, people have to go through that much effort like getting artistes to risk injuring their body - and yet offer lucky draw prizes like a car? i strongly believe that when we put our hands in our pocket and take out some money to help these needy people, we shouldn't do it in the hope that we will win some cash. i don't like the way they were promoting the NKF Cancer Show. it's wrong, so WRONG. my mum has always taught me that if we really want to help someone, do it through actions. for example, there is this auntie at AMK Mrt Station. she has only one leg and she's around 75. everyday without fail, she will be stationed outside, selling tissue packs. my mum will always tell me to give the poor lady $2 and refuse to take the tissue packs. that will truly help her. that will be called. donation.

oh well... no use talking about it. ha!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
14:38


Sunday, July 10, 2005

time flies.

aiya i didn't bring my camera!!!!!

was a seah street.. walking walking. peeped into this glass. and i was greeted by this massive display of body artwork - tattoos!!! this naked guy laid on the doctor's bed. well, it looked like a doctor's bed. sprawled on his stomach. NAKED, i repeat. NAKED. i could see his FULL ASS. his FULL TATTOOED ASS. he's tattooed half his ass. i think he was waiting to tattoo the other half??? it looked NICE. cute asses. LOL.. and yes, i could see 1/5 of his balls.

it's just a few days more to a year since we last left for brisbane. in the blink of an eye, we're going to have our graduation ceremony in two weeks. yet the memory still seems to fresh, like it was just a few months ago that we were in brisbane and came back. i regret not spending much time hanging out with ray and bran. lol.. they're such great company. and i regret spending so much money.
but well... was talking to mick.. and he agreed time flies. it's scary isnt it? i remember those cold winter times, though there weren't snow. and i didnt know 15 d celcius was that bad. so bad we had to fight for the heater. can u imagine 3 people crowding around this small little heater? how bout having just one thin cotton blanket for winter? lol... walking on the streets at 6am-home? when everyone is just waking up, we're just getting ready for bed. going to strip clubs when we're god-damn bored? lol.. that's for stephie and me. i guess the best part was cooking. three cooks who have not had any cooking lessons. three cooks who came out with LPPL dishes. dishes one would rather die than to taste. but we got through it. haha... anyone heard of steaming potatoes? yes, we did it. how bout having 4 tablespoons of chilli powder in your dish of lala? liuyong loves it, i bet ;) oh, those days....
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
@
00:02


Saturday, July 09, 2005

GOD. When he talks, cash just flies outta his mouth.

this guy. GOD! Fantastic. Impressive. UNBELIEVABLE knowledge! he knows what he talks about. he talks about going to bahamas. his treat. with his cousins. talks about Chanel, LV, Prada. from Houston to Japan to HongKong. Even Milan. DHL-ing a load of Coach bags from Houston.
He prints money? Probably.

who? his uncle is head of consumer banking. his father is a family friend of lihong. sister goes to INSEAD. $180,000 for Masters? and yes, Trek. also.. somethin about Shangri-La. how does Suntec Reits sound to you?

$25,000 to him? CAN DO. Just that he exceeded his card limit.

his age? well..... 22 =)
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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18:15




i shall stop my defamotary actions this day

i ought to believe in the goodness of a single person. no matter how mean or how evil a person is, he has his good points. i refer to this certain lady whom i have been mentioning in my blog often.

i realised i don't hate her as much as i think i did. in fact, i never really disliked her. i counted the number of times she flared up at me. out of ten times, ONE. i should really stop disliking her because of the one time she flares at me out of those ten times. hard as it will be watching someone close to me being shouted at 9.5/10 times, i will still try to see the goodness in her.

she has not called for 2 days. i got worried. in fact... i was more worried than the unlucky victim of verbal assults. well of course.. cos she treats me better. but really, these 2 days of no action made me realise that deep down, i still have a high regard for her. i still do care for her a lot. cheng says i always put others before self. but that's not true. when you have people who care for you and offer to take you out, keep you company, like a soulmate, you will tend to care for them also. unless u're only after their money. which, unfortunately, i AM NOT. i do not go out with her or accompany her because of the materialistic comforts she might be able to share with me. but because she is such a doting relative... and being a single... i guess as one who is fortunate enough to be showered with her love, i ought to do something for her, to keep her company. to let her feel that, hey, life is worth living for. also.. she's really one whom i can look up to. we do have quite a number of similarities.. u get wat i mean? oh well.. *bah*

i will stop critisizing this instant.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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11:37


Friday, July 08, 2005

blackheads outbreak

i just read the nutrition label on that can of honey roasted macadamias. damn.. 100g of macadamias gives you 3300kJ. that's kinda equivalent to 2 days' energy consumption. and it's like.. once you start, you can't stop. it's simply yummi-licious.

yesterday i bumped into heather and wanni. it's been such a long time since i saw heather. she looks slimmer now. as for wanni, so matured. albeit she was the "wisest" jie jie in our group and the craziest, she was still matured. we felt like kids then. lol. and now, still. but it's good to know that after taking on this new job of hers, she's started to stop being late. lol.. probably wT should take a pointer or two from her. me too.... am starting to have this habit of being late for appointments.

i asked wanni why did she take up this job offer. why did she choose this path. she told me she didn't expect herself to walk this way also.. someone just suggested it and she decided to give it a try. as time goes by, since she is required to have some knowledge on her job, she's decided to get involved. and this slowly develops into an interest.
likewise, i didn't expect myself to even look at economics, interest rates or any business / finance topics. but look what i'm doing now. or rather, look what i'm deciding to do. no doubt i went in for the big returns. the money. but i guess i'm starting to take a little interest in what i'm doing now... especially when i have this crazy friend who's aiming to make his first 1 Mil through stocks and hardwork. oh well... i still have a long way to go....... options, futures, securities *dang*

just an announcement here. if you guys know of anyone who likes buying gems like TOP QUALITY jades, sapphiers, emeralds or even diamonds, please give me a call =)
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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14:48


Thursday, July 07, 2005

we, the ambivalent beings with titties

my whole body is aching after taking two days off under the false reasons of "company retreat", which in actually fact, was spent in slogging over the unpacking of rubbish and necessities at her new apartment in upper east coast.

i have seriously never seen that much things before. i mean to have more than 30 boxes of "Stuffs" owned by a single person. clothes alone took up like 6 boxes. hangers about 3. CRYSTALS! oh boy.. they took up one whole Berlingo. toiletries? 2 boxes. i kinda did a rough estimation. unpacking those things were really tiring. but i relaxed by mid afternoon.. lol.

anyway, i didn't come on blogger to talk about the things i moved. i came here... to make in print about how much of a snob a rich citizen can be.

for years, the government has been stressing on "tolerance" to the people around us. we've been studying a lot of that in ME, in CE, in whatever E. we should be "considerate" and be able to "tolerate" with the happenings around us. wasn't that what we were taught? Yes, indeed. and I happen to know that, yes. There is a limit to tolerance and consideration. And there are also times where we should be flexible and break one of these "recommended rules of peace".

let me tell you how irritating rich citizens / neighbours are.

it was 6pm when the workers started drilling the first hole for the huge painting. 5 mins later, the security guard came up. a dark handsome man in his 50's. at least he still looked alright then. he told us we were not suppose to do drilling after 6pm. but we explained that we were new, so we were not aware of the rules. so we persuaded him to try to bend the rules a little and let us do our work till 7:30pm. so we'll stick to that time. 7.30.
we carried on drilling. and hey, it wasn't continuous drilling. 13 holes altogether. and there was a time lapse in between because the owner was still indecisive as to how the painting was to be displayed. anyways, at 6:30, we received a call from the security guard. his name is derrick. yes, he told us he's just gotten another complaint. but he'll bend the rules and we'd better be done by then. we encountered some problems. wrong measurements.
so... work work, drill drill, security guard called. shouted over the phone.
"Please lah, mrs tan (that's me.). can you please stop now? i've received 2-3 complaints already! don't give me trouble can or not. bloody shit."
"just two more holes. please? we'll be done in 15 mins."
*slam phone*

what kinda fucking attitude was that?

alright.. so we went on doing our stuff and at 7pm, we received another call. this time from that neighbour staying on the first floor. she has either got sun wukong's ears or she's a faithful follower of energy practices, like reiki. we were on the 30th floor.
"hi, would you please stop your work now? i've been waiting since 6:30pm. i need to put my two kids to bed. bla bla.. i didnt catch her words"
i was thinking. damn you. do you really think you are in australia??!! getting your kids to sleep at 6:30pm? oh.. so that your hubby and you can get some quality time together eh? OH. I GET IT.

alright. so we were doing the finishing touches. (drilling sessions were over) and that idiotic security came banging on the door. i didnt actually wanna open. but i did. and i was really annoyed with his attitude.
"CAN YOU PLEASE STOP NOW? I RECEIVED SO MANY COMPLAINTS ALREADY. CAN YOU ASK THEM TO COME BACK TOMORROW OR NOT? SICK LAH YOU ALL"
he must be deaf. cos when i opened the door, i already said "WE ARE DONE". what an ass. i saw him going home happily with a bag of food in his hand. i should really take a huge banana and shove it into his mouth that time. gian beng gian sai.

but well, i admit we were inconsiderate to hammer and drill past 6pm. but hey, it isn't even 8pm.. where people MIGHT BE getting to sleep. and it's like..... we've only just moved in. cant we get some lax o'er here? and it's not like we will keep at it EVERYDAY. rich fucks no nothing. and WOMAN, YOU should be thankful that it's the security guards and not the police who came knocking on the door.

in society, i guess we should all give and take. there are times we need to be inconsiderate a little to accomplish a little something, so that we can get things done faster. and when we act that way once in a while, then it must be because of some good reasons that made us do things that way. as onlookers, wouldn't it be nicer if we were to try to tolerate a little? is asking for a little tolerance for 2 hours A LOT TO ASK FOR?

what do you guys think? am i wrong? oh well, it's subjective. what i know is.... rich people are fuckers. lol. to have that statement coming outta my mouth doesn't do me good. i have aspirations that i wanna achieve to make me be a rich person. but i guess outta so many rich people in this society, 88% are probably snobs. i'd wish to be in that 12%.

but before i day dream any further... i'd better get myself some mental therapy. have been bursting my top a lot of times and it's getting to easy these days. i wonder why the hell am i changing so fast? for wat reasons? damn.................
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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17:29


Monday, July 04, 2005

i've decided to strike off my last post simply because i didnt feel too good about it. i should stop complaining about how i've been treated. i should really stop back- stabbing. i'm degrading myself to talk about all that junk. damn. this shouldn't have happened. but still.. i hope one day some one will knock some sense into one who has had too much of the good things in life they forget about the small little things that make up life.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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23:14


Sunday, July 03, 2005

over-eat.under-eat.balance.

helped my aunt pack her things today again. this time round, it was better. marcus and his wife came to help. that was a lot of help though they went back mid afternoon. it didn't matter. it was their presence that helped. it was the kinda feeling of a family's togetherness. =)
anyways... got myself a pair of gucci sunglasses. found it and looted it actually. lol. and i dare proclaim i'm not materialistic. i didnt know it was gucci until she told me lah.. so not counted rite? haha... i'm still waiting for her to offer me the lifesize porcelain doll and all her bears. i know i'm greedy, but well... take it or leave it.

on my way, there was an accident on the cte. the jam was like from ang mo kio ave 3 all the way till amk ave 1. know what happened? 11 cars were involved in the collision. that was really somethin. COOL.

and oh cL, i think this might be of interest to you.. ;0)
mike wiluan on the papers. an article features him and his dad's empire. his dad is boss to the nongsa resorts on batam, and are talking to the government in indonesia for developing another resort island. didn't pay much attention to it. but the report states that he is married to a korean-american model. ahha.. and also, he's investing in a s'pore post production company, Infinite Works. i dont know if it's investing or buying over. apparently, this company, Infinite Works is the animation studio developing MinFong Ho's Sing to The Dawn =) so.. i guess you know what to do when you graduate ;)

i love my crystal. more than ever.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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22:39


Saturday, July 02, 2005

the meanest

i seem to have rather bad blood these days, despite the fact that i am already having my menses. look at the number of people i have screamed at, or at least gave them my piece of mind.

firstly, there was my very poor mum. lately, i seem to just scream at her for no obvious reasons. like.. i wouldn't react that way in the past. that day she was just peeping over me, just GLANCING at what i was doing. and i shouted at her. that's pretty bad. oh no, it's atrocious, as derek cable would have put it. LoL. insiders' joke. anyways, yeah.. i broke her heart. i know how it feels, yet how could i bring myself to do it? there's something about my temper, must be. or it could very well be the bad aura of this place. hoho.

then came naan. he is kinda pathetic. pathetic as in out of 10 girls he ask for a date, 9.9 will reject him. is that pathetic? he looks absolutely fine. not good looking but CAN DO. i repeat. CAN DO. and his english is actually NOT BAD, taking into consideration that he is really an indian. but i don't quite understand why do girls run away from him.
my impression of him is actually not very good. he comes across as a really whiney person. he could just go on and on complaining about how people at online communities shun him, leave him outta conversations, about how friends around him are able to find girlfriends despite the fact that they are worst than him, about how his pool kakis dont really like playing pool with him despite him being a good player. oh... i can't really click with his topics cos i simply can't be bothered. if no one wanna friend you.. there's nothing you can do wat. i mean of course you can find someone to bitch to lar... but..... i'm sorry i'm not kind enough. well, one day i got sick of his complaining and told him off on msn. i think i sounded a lil harsh, but i did say sorry. oh well, watever.
"watever is what losers can all afford to say" mLm
- WATEVER -

then, along came my aunt. we have always been on good terms. but sometimes, argh. i don't know what to say of her. could it be her insecurity in life that makes her behave the way she does? i really don't know. it's so damn difficult to analyze her. mumsy says that good bosses never show their anger / happiness. that way, their staff will never know what the boss likes and doesn't like, hence will not turn those points against you. but with her, she's always unhappy. like what tank says.. "she expects you to reach that certain level she has set for you. when you reach it, she lifts that level. that way, you will never reach her expectations of you. in a way, it's good. u keep improving. and that's what makes our relationship all the more interesting." he's quite right. yet the feeling of not meeting one's target is so fuckin lousy. and i just realised that i'm a sore loser. more often than not, i refuse to be in the wrong. i refuse to get pin pointed. i get angry like that. SORE LOSER, YING!

i feel like eating subway today again. but the security at raffles city is scary. u know those prison guards who stand on those high towers @ changi or any army camp as a matter of fact? yeah.. those scarecrow-like policemen. they are there. and they have set up security check counters at ALL ENTRANCES/EXITS. security here is really tight. but i think military men look so smart in their uniform. tasty. LOL. and sweaty, that is. hahaha... i loved seeing my brother in his ncc uniform. but i hated the stench.

alrite. subway be it then.

i'm an adult yet to pass my adolescence i guess. i'm still pretty caught up in my childhood days. DIE LAR!! HOW!!!! -_-"
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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11:33


Friday, July 01, 2005

i'd hate to love you, i'd love to hate you too

it's funny how we can love a person so much and yet hate him in just a short period of time. little things they do make you happy, yet because of some little imperfections that you cannot come to terms with can make you hate them so much.

i have this really serious love-hate relationship with my aunt. oh yes, she might not be the best aunt on earth, but she's after all my aunt and i do hold a certain level of respect and admiration for her. my mum says i'm her favourite niece. well, i have got to be. the other and only cousin from that side of the family i have is rhoda, who is too young to communicate with my aunt. that's logical.

well, i had a little tiff with her on the way to ikea. i think she's rather funny at times. i don't understand the way she looks at things. oh well, it's the same with everyone else. we all have different views on this world. i just hold a different stand. okay.

i'm pretty pissed the way some rich people carry themselves. my mum was telling me once j. yip's sister came into the shop and was acting really snobbishly. stupid woman. lol.
another thing is... rich people who can afford tens of thousands without battering an eyelid or frown on materialistic possessions simply CANNOT RESIST SQUEEZING EVERY SINGLE DROP OF SWEAT FROM THE PEASANTS!!!!! like hey, they can spend so much money on a chopard watch yet they have to even take away the commission of a salesman trying to sell his product. they squeeze him dry. imagine. a housemover. most of them are ah peks thriving hard to make a decent living, risking breaking their backs. and these rich people still wanna squeeze whatever is left of them?! this is bad man... it's extortion. and they don't understand. they never will. have they ever gone through poverty? well, if they have, they musta forgotten their roots! dammit. i'm quite pissed, but i dont know how should i express my displeasure.

alrite. sleep time!!
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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22:36




lol this site is just so funny. go!! take a look!!

look @ paris hilton's ad. man, were they promoting the car or hilton herself? and eating a burger while soap-washing a car?? that's WEIRD.

boo. i can't stand my mum at times. she's so funny. i caught her staring at my boobs YET AGAIN. it's not the first time. she does that all the time. so i got real mad. i mean, hey, who wouldn't get mad if her boobs got stared? that's pretty sick. well yah i know she was trying to make sure it's not visible enough for perverts to take a second look. but. damn i give up describing. it wasn't really very nice to stare like that. i got pissed, i pulled her shirt apart. and she got mad of course. gave me a slap. oh well, whatever.
i caught her staring again at the mrt station. any remedies for such queer behaviours?

i simply love clara to bits. she came down again.. and bought us mini fruit tarts! such sinful indulgence =) and she encourages it. everytime she comes down, it's seah street. lol. i'd love to hate her though, but i can't. haha!

had subway for lunch. ripped $6 off my miserable pocket money. and i was actually thinkin of eating subway everyday. $6 x 6 x 4 = $144 on lunch itself is really bad.

i can't wait for school to start. working here is really boring. am trying to come out with elegant taglines for the anniversary sales. any idea? i came out with really lame and boring ones like..
"let our beauties entice you". wtf? beautiful gems, i mean. and this has gotta be the lamest.
"lick your lips. carress your wrist. it's yours..." it shows a statue of a woman - outlining her busts; a 14carat diamond bracelet sits over her curves.

back to my brainstorming.
Dreamed a PuRpLe DrEaM
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15:45