Saturday, July 02, 2005
the meanesti seem to have rather bad blood these days, despite the fact that i am already having my menses. look at the number of people i have screamed at, or at least gave them my piece of mind.
firstly, there was my very poor mum. lately, i seem to just scream at her for no obvious reasons. like.. i wouldn't react that way in the past. that day she was just peeping over me, just GLANCING at what i was doing. and i shouted at her. that's pretty bad. oh no, it's atrocious, as derek cable would have put it. LoL.
insiders' joke. anyways, yeah.. i broke her heart. i know how it feels, yet how could i bring myself to do it? there's something about my temper, must be. or it could very well be the bad aura of this place. hoho.
then came naan. he is kinda pathetic. pathetic as in out of 10 girls he ask for a date, 9.9 will reject him. is that pathetic? he looks absolutely fine. not good looking but CAN DO. i repeat. CAN DO. and his english is actually NOT BAD, taking into consideration that he is really an indian. but i don't quite understand why do girls run away from him.
my impression of him is actually not very good. he comes across as a really whiney person. he could just go on and on complaining about how people at online communities shun him, leave him outta conversations, about how friends around him are able to find girlfriends despite the fact that they are worst than him, about how his pool kakis dont really like playing pool with him despite him being a good player. oh... i can't really click with his topics cos i simply can't be bothered. if no one wanna friend you.. there's nothing you can do wat. i mean of course you can find someone to bitch to lar... but..... i'm sorry i'm not kind enough. well, one day i got sick of his complaining and told him off on msn. i think i sounded a lil harsh, but i did say sorry. oh well, watever.
"watever is what losers can all afford to say" mLm - WATEVER -then, along came my aunt. we have always been on good terms. but sometimes, argh. i don't know what to say of her. could it be her insecurity in life that makes her behave the way she does? i really don't know. it's so damn difficult to analyze her. mumsy says that good bosses never show their anger / happiness. that way, their staff will never know what the boss likes and doesn't like, hence will not turn those points against you. but with her, she's always unhappy. like what tank says.. "she expects you to reach that certain level she has set for you. when you reach it, she lifts that level. that way, you will never reach her expectations of you. in a way, it's good. u keep improving. and that's what makes our relationship all the more interesting." he's quite right. yet the feeling of not meeting one's target is so fuckin lousy. and i just realised that i'm a sore loser. more often than not, i refuse to be in the wrong. i refuse to get pin pointed. i get angry like that. SORE LOSER, YING!
i feel like eating subway today again. but the security at raffles city is scary. u know those prison guards who stand on those high towers @ changi or any army camp as a matter of fact? yeah.. those scarecrow-like policemen. they are there. and they have set up security check counters at ALL ENTRANCES/EXITS. security here is really tight. but i think military men look so smart in their uniform. tasty. LOL. and sweaty, that is. hahaha... i loved seeing my brother in his ncc uniform. but i hated the stench.
alrite. subway be it then.
i'm an adult yet to pass my adolescence i guess. i'm still pretty caught up in my childhood days. DIE LAR!! HOW!!!! -_-"
Dreamed a PuRpLe
DrEaM
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11:33
